Beach Boys

Well.  It’s May.  MAY!!!  I’m still thinking we’re in 2015.  And here we are almost halfway through the year.  I’ve been busy.  I’ve moved from paradise to the ever promised, yet not so sunny California.  Me.  A California resident!  HA!  This place is weird.  WEIRD!!  And has terrible drivers.  And it’s COLD. OK.  Maybe it isn’t really that cold.  But I’m sitting in a hoodie and jeans with socks on.  In MAY.  In southern California.  I know I used to mock these people, but the Middle East and Hawaii are HOT.  So it’s cold here for me.  I became accustomed to not wearing socks.  I enjoyed my flip-flops.  This here.  Not cool, man.  Not cool.

On the other hand, In-N-Out Burger.  And Dunkin’ Donuts.  And road trips.  So there’s that.  And Disneyland!  It’s been so long since I’ve been to a Disney park.  😦  My new apartment is pretty awesome.  I live by an airport.  And a library.  And I’m convinced that other than work I never have to leave.  And I don’t want to.  Because cold.  And I’m deathly afraid I’ll be slammed into a New Jersey barrier every time I get on the highway.  Excuse me, freeway.  Which, by the way, you have to get on to get ANYWHERE.  And traffic.  Worse than New York.  Because there’s 18 lanes and 40 different freeways to merge onto simply to go 2 miles.  I went to the outlet mall the first week we got here.  It was LITERALLY across the street from Mexico.  Literally.  I could wave at the people crossing the border.  Weird.

I’ve resumed singing with the church choir I joined when I was here for a few months sometime back.  It’s been pretty epic.  Except, apparently people have been getting their cars stolen.  FROM A CHURCH PARKING LOT!!  Well, technically it’s the parking lot for the school that is attached to the church.  But still.  What is wrong with society?  Last night we had rehearsal and this woman comes up to the choir loft scared out of her mind.  She’s an older woman, but in pretty good shape.  She asks if there’s anyone who we can call from security because there is a man standing on the statue of Jesus in the parking lot.  This poor woman was simply trying to walk home and there’s some guy ON the statue of Jesus and she was spooked.  So I go outside and down a ways with her to see what is going on (the church/school grounds are pretty large).

About a year ago, the church I grew up in had some vandalism issues and I was thinking it was some punks doing something similar.  Even more bizarre, though.  This guy was standing in front of the statue of Jesus (which is rather elevated and to be honest, I’m kind of impressed at how he got up there) with his arms outstretched to mirror Jesus’s.  He wasn’t doing anything else, just standing there.  And that’s how this woman had initially seen him.  But he was wearing all black and had a bandanna around his head.  Creepy.  I was going to yell at him and this older woman insisted I simply call the cops.  ‘He could have a gun!‘ she said.  Well, no sense in arguing with that.  People are crazy these days.  And hey, I’m not bullet proof.  Yet.

So a police car shows up.  And then another one.  And another.  And then there were six of them.  Something about there not being a lot going on in this area.  I guess that’s a good thing?  They get him down and cuff him.  He wasn’t resisting and I overhear one of the cops saying ‘You were rapping for me about Jesus last week.’  So I’m assuming this guy has done things like this in the past.  But still.  Weird, weird vibes.  I walked this older woman home (she was only across the street) with one of the cops watching us cross the street and come back and there’s this guy walking his dog.  He asks me if I know this guy who the police are still talking to and he proceeds to say that the guy was telling him (the one who is currently in cuffs) that he was Jesus.  Harmless, but telling the guy to worship him.  I went back to rehearsal and don’t know what became of the guy.  But strange, strange evening.

It finally stopped raining this morning.  Something about it never rains in southern California is simply a LIE!  LIES!!!  It’s rained every week since we moved here.  And it’s still cold!  The sun is still nowhere to be seen and I am STILL waiting for my movers to arrive so I can have furniture like a civilized human again, but no word from them yet either.  I was assured when I called the agent earlier that they’d be here no later than 11.  I guess they still have an hour, but I want a bed again!  And a couch.  Not that I don’t love my hammock.  But.  Yeah.

Until next time, blog followers.  Hakuna Matata.




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