Down With The Sickness

So I’m down with the sickness. 😦 It’s not fun. I took nyquil last night around 7PM and I’m pretty sure it kicked in at 6:30AM this morning. Don’t get me wrong,  I slept for 9 hours and 50 minutes last night (according to my fitbit. Ah such a great thing!!!), but yeah. I was dying at work this morning. I’m hoping the worst of it is over!

You gotta put the past behind you!  So says my favorite movie.  Which, yes, also came up at work today. You know you’re in a good place when you can have a legitimate ranking board of Disney movies at 6AM.  What more can you really want from life?  Except maybe to be still sleeping at 6AM. Details.

Anyway. Sleep is beckoning. Hopefully this cold will kick it tonight. But it was the end of the month. Go OCD! ‘Til February, fellow blog readers!

Hakuna Matata (yes, The Lion King was a unanimous #1)!

Here’s to 2017!

So it’s that time of year again. My main motivation for blogging today is that my OCD won’t allow me to not have a December post.  Haha. In keeping with sappy, traditional end of year posts, I will leave you with the short and sweet synopsis of my past year: I’ve reaffirmed I am extremely lucky to have the people I have in my life. Shocking, I know you didn’t think I’d go there. But I did! But in all seriousness, I have the greatest family. And yes, I do consider my friends family. Over the years we grow apart. We grow closer.  You see who’s there for you and who used to be there may no longer be – for whatever reason. It’s bittersweet in these moments,  but that’s part of life I guess.

For 2017, there’s no New Year’s resolutions… I’ll do better, I’ll quit this, etcetera, etcetera. I think I’ve already written a post about how when I want to change something I don’t need a new year to make it happen. But I do look forward to what the new year brings. I may move once or twice or not at all. A strange concept for me, but I look forward to the uncertainty. Hopefully, I will move at least once go to my next job, learn more about my career, meet new people, maybe say goodbye to some old people. To be determined.

Happy New Year,  Blog world! Hakuna Matata!

Thankfulness

Whelp.  It’s almost the end of November.  I’ve been writing this post in my head since the 1st.  But here we are.  Time freaking flies.  It’s amazing.  Here I am sitting on a plane on my way home for the holiday and no update to mention.  Yeah, I know.  I’m a terrible blogger.  2016 has been a pretty crazy year.  There are quite a few of my facebook friends who insist we don’t even acknowledge this year in the future.  But I have to admit, it’s been a pretty memorable one for me.  I’ve moved from Hawaii to San Diego to South Carolina.  I’ve explored Iceland and Denmark and Estonia and the outer skirts of Germany, and visited Russia and Sweden and Finland.  I’ve driven across the United States on an epic road trip and visited famous landmarks and national parks.  I’ve crossed the Pacific Ocean and I’ve gotten to visit friends and family across the country.  So can I really complain?  These are the things that matter.  I am so blessed to have the people I do in my life. Regardless of how they got there.  I’ve revisited our nation’s Capitol and returned to the greatest city in the world twice (yes, I’m referring to New York).  And I still have this weekend and Christmas to enjoy before the year is out.

I’ve been fortunate enough to join my dive family in Florida for an annual Thanksgiving celebration, not to mention surprise my family for my dad and uncle’s birthdays.  I’ve reunited with my college roommate and made new friends at my latest job.  Of course there has also been failure and total feeling of loss and despair.  But mostly joy.  At least the stuff I choose to dwell on.  And that’s what I think is the key.  Why focus on the bad?  There’s so much good.  Moving for the third time this year was a struggle. Leaving the people I grew to care for and accept was challenging.  Returning to academia was a lot harder than I imagined it would be.  But there have been a multitude of people who have helped me get where I am.  And I am more than grateful for their input.  From the 5:30AM wake up calls to wish me well on an exam or just to say hi, to the random texts and messages just that say people are thinking of me and are hoping I am well.  Those mean the world to me.  Even if I’m not the greatest at conveying that in the moment.

I’m thankful for more than I can ever write about in a blog post.  My family plays a huge part in that.  As crazy as they drive me at times, they are the best.  I don’t care who you are.  You don’t beat the genuineness and love that is experienced in my family.  I have the best friends.  We can not talk for months.  And when I pick up the phone in a moment of despair or boredom, they are there for me.  I’m a pretty crappy friend.  My job takes up a lot of my time.  And when I’m not working, I’m kind of burnt out.  And a loner.  Not in the creepy or bad way.  I just like me time.  So I screen my calls and texts and eventually, I will get back to you.  But aside from the fact that I’m usually asleep before 9PM and I talk to about 2 people on a regular basis (and yes, one of those humans is my mom), my people are still there for me in spite of that.  I don’t get invites to go to the opera 500 miles away.  But I get videos of my friends being awesome and killing it in their chosen profession.  And updates on so and so and what I’ve missed.  Like nothing has changed since I left New York.  And I’d like to think that as anti-social as I can be, my people do know that I would be there for them in a heartbeat if they truly needed me.  It’s funny how that works.  But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Happy Thanksgiving, Blog World.  Always remember.  Even when things don’t seem to be going right, there’s always SOMETHING to be thankful for. Hakuna Matata!

Exploring Home

I’m incredibly spoiled.  I grew up in the greatest city in the world.  Whether you agree with this fact or not is entirely up to you.  Everyone is entitled to my opinion on my blog! 😀  But seriously, New York City is an amazing, wonderful place.  It will always be home.  So why don’t I live there?  Well, for starters, there’s not a whole lot in the field of rocket science in the most populated city in the United States.  And I couldn’t do my current job there.  And there are too many people.  SO. MANY. PEOPLE.  And noise!  It’s what makes it home and I’m not complaining about it.  You don’t even notice the noise after a while and most people are so absorbed in their own lives that you don’t really notice them either.  The last time I was there, I asked a cashier how her day was going and she looked at me like I had 12 heads.  That’s my city that I love.

New Yorkers get this rap that we’re rude and fast and don’t care about anyone.  We’re not that rude.  We just don’t take part in a lot of the pleasantries that the rest of the country does.  It’s just different.  When I lived in Germany, one of my friends asked me if it was true that English speakers ask how you are doing without really wanting to know.  I was confused by the question.  She elaborated, saying her English teacher told them that English speakers always ask “How are you?” but don’t wait for a response.  It’s true.  We use it more of a greeting as you would hello.  In that regard, though, non-native English speakers think we’re the ones being rude.  It’s the same thing in New York for the most part.  Not always.  But could you imagine if we stopped to talk to EVERYONE we ran into.  You would never get anywhere.

Fast is debatable.  My father is one of the slowest people I know.  And he’s been there a hell of a lot longer than I have.  He CAN be quick with some things.  But he’s pretty slow by most standards.  No offense, Dad – love you!  Anyway, I’m digressing.  I started this post because a friend of mine is thinking of moving to another city.  I’m probably a terrible person to talk to about moving: I’ve had 12 different addresses in the past 8 years.  But she made a comment about being bored in a new city.  It made me think.  Most of my friends from NY are still living there.  Actually, I’m struggling to think of any of them that aren’t at the moment.  A lot of them stayed for school and then found a job there or are still studying or whatever.

So the prospect of moving is daunting because it’s all you know if you haven’t ventured out.  And to most of us city kids, EVERYWHERE else is boring. Because what is there to do in suburbia when you’ve lived in the non-stop, world famous New York for your entire life?  But having been to the middle of nowhere and back again, there’s SO much more than what’s enclosed in the 305 square miles that is NYC.  I’ve found something in every city I’ve been to, from the sheer beauty of nature or history of a region or the food or even the people!  I know that’s shocking to hear from me.

As I think about settling down in my newest home (it’s been like a month and a half now), I am frustrated and excited about it.  Moving all the time has kept me from getting bored in one place.  Quite the contrary, I find I’m there for long enough to find the things I want to do and check out and not long enough to do everything I want.  Like vacation.  There’s ALWAYS more to see.  If you’re doing it right, at least.  At the same time, finding new people and new places is fun and awesome, but you can miss your old routines and people and the environment you created for yourself.  For me, it keeps me engaged.  It’s not for everyone, that’s for sure.  Some days I’m not even sure it IS for me.  But then I find out I’m moving.  Again.  And the excitement rushed back in.  Explore.  Find the hole in the wall place and the random, crazy person that makes the day that much better, and the secluded spot that you can go and relax and think about life.  And then when you go back to visit, you have all the benefits of being a local and a tourist.  And that is wonderful.

 

October is Here!

So it occurred to me as I was driving into work this morning that for the first time in my adult life I am living somewhere with seasons!  I am ecstatic for this fact.  The cooler air is more than refreshing as I head out each morning.  HOODIE WEATHER IS COMING!  It is amazing! Not to mention the epicness that is October!  The greatest possible month of the year!  =]  Shout out to the October babies out there!  Whoo!  And Halloween!  And fall!  And hockey!!  If you can’t tell, this is my favorite month.

As I know work will start becoming more demanding of me in the next few weeks or so, I am enjoying the time I have today to update this wonderful blog, even if it is about nothing too exciting.  Life is short.  Do what you want.  Say what you feel.  Dream big and embrace what you have.  Don’t wait for everything to be perfect to accept that you have an awesome life.  And if you don’t feel that way, take the initiative to change the things you can so you do.  It’s all about perspective.  How YOU see yourself is what matters.  If you’re not happy, it’s because you aren’t allowing yourself to be.  Well, I wasn’t planning on a motivational speech over here, but my fingers just started typing!

Hakuna Matata!

Transported

Facebook has that nifty feature that allows you to see your memories ‘on this day’.  I have mixed feelings about seeing some of my old posts, but overall, I think it’s pretty cool.  Apparently, a year ago today, I added a new post to this wonderful blog and so I decided to go back and read it.  The interesting thing about reading things I’ve written is that I can literally be transported to that moment in time when I was writing it.  It seems like yesterday and all the thoughts and emotions and ideas that I had in the moment of writing those words come flooding back.  Last week I stumbled upon some of the stories I started writing when I was living in Germany and felt the same rush of thoughts, even if the words I was reading had nothing to do with anything else going on at the time.  I guess it’s comparable to when you hear a certain song and can think of the first time you heard it or the time you and your bestie rocked out to it on that epic road trip or whatever.  Same thing for my writing.

So I was transported back to a year ago.  Pretty crazy how much has changed since then.  I’ve traveled across the Pacific Ocean since then, moved from Hawaii to California, drove across the country to move back to the East Coast not too long after that, dove between continental shelves, drove the perimeter of Iceland, cruised on the Baltic Sea, and started going back to school.  Yeah, I’ve been meaning to update this thing for a while.  The same thing happened when I started reading stories from over 5 years ago now.  Some days, I can’t fathom how it has been that long.  Part of me is curious to go back to reading some of the stuff from here when I first started this thing IN NEW ZEALAND!  In 2011!!!  :O  How is that possible?!

Anyway, I really have no exciting things to write about on this topic other than I was transported to the past and it made me excited (and sad and happy and all those other things) and so I wanted to share.  And of course the pledge to update more frequently.  But we all know I’m pretty unreliable in that area.  So.  Happy Wednesday!  Hakuna Matata!

Life Paths

As more and more of my friends get engaged and married and have children or get pets, I find myself wondering how my life may have been different if I didn’t follow the paths I did.  There are days when I think it would be the coolest thing in the world to have a mini human.  They are few and far between, but they are there.  And there are days when I miss my little monster (I use this term affectionately) so damn freaking much that I can’t imagine how anyone could possibly ever want to not experience the joy a puppy could bring.  But then I think of how heartbroken I was having to leave him every morning to go to school and work and life.

I am a nomad.  I literally just moved less than three months ago and I’m jonesing to go somewhere else.  It’s really hard to travel when you’ve got a dog who can’t go with you.  Or kids, I’d imagine.  But it’s hard to travel with adults too.  I started this blog shortly after I got to New Zealand.  After spending 6 months on my own in Germany.  I’ve posted about the challenges of living in a foreign country, not knowing the language or people and being 6 hours and 5,000 miles off from your people.  I stand by those sentiments still.  Before I did the study abroad in Italy, I couldn’t even go to a fast food place by myself, even just to pick up food to go let alone live in a different country by myself.  I would rather starve than be by myself.  Not because I wanted to be around other people, but because I hated appearing lonely in front of other people.  I don’t know why that distinction was important, but it was.

Europe made me change that mindset.  I wanted to see what was out there.  And I didn’t know anyone so I had to go by myself if I wanted to have that adventure.  And in traveling solo, I discovered something incredible.  I met people I would have never given the time of day to ordinarily.  I spent time on the things I thought were fascinating and skipped the boring stuff.  To me.  That’s the beauty of people, though.  We all are enchanted by different things.  Finding someone who will like and dislike the exact same things as you is nearly impossible.  Sure, there will be some similarities, but we all do appreciate different things.  Having that opportunity to experience things at your own pace is something everyone should be afforded.  It made me stronger.  And more independent.

Traveling alone, however, can also lose some of the magic.  It is nice to share certain moments with other people, especially those you love (platonic or otherwise!).  I’m planning my next adventure – it shall be epic.  There’s driving across the country, and gallivanting through different bodies of water, and cruising to countries I’ve only read about.  And I don’t want to go alone.  But I do.  Because planning this adventure is proving to be more stressful than I anticipated.  Mostly because I’ve become so accustomed to doing what I want, when I want, I don’t know how to compromise.  Well.  I don’t want to.  And because visas are involved.  And consulates.  And no email addresses and I have to call people and speak to them.  On the phone: I hate the phone.  This is 2016 for goodness sake!  I should be able to text someone to get a visa!

But when adventuring with other people, you have to take into consideration their stuff.  Well, at least you should. So back to seeing my friends committing to other people and all.  I can’t even commit to where to go for dinner!  And I wonder.  If I never went to Italy, if I never moved to Germany, or studied in New Zealand, or worked for Continental: Where would I be?  Would I want to travel?  Would I still be with my college boyfriend? Would I have the career path I found myself in?  Would I have more education?  Maybe I would be living back in New York. Maybe I’d have my dog.  Who knows?  I think things happen for a reason.  What those reasons are?  No idea.  But we end up where we do to affect someone or something.  In my opinion.  Good or bad – we have purpose.

It’s crazy how many variables there are out there.  But ultimately, mine has been pretty freaking awesome.  It’s been a roller coaster, but I’m ready for the next turn.